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Camping dinner, blackened tilapia tacos with corn on the cob with butter and salt.

I'm in my '50s, straight cis female. I've been married and divorced twice. I have dated quite a lot both exclusively and as part of polyamory. I have had several of my gay or bi friends tell me I should give up on dating men and try dating women because they get it. And they make much better partners. But it's just not how I'm wired. I'm very straight, and when I was younger I proved that to myself by being open-minded to explore that. And I'm not sure if it's just men in general, because I definitely don't want a bad mouth an entire group of people, or it's just the men that I have met in my life. Most of them seem like they are predatory at worst, or lack emotional skills at best. Women demand and should expect a 50/50 partnership. And this includes mental labor. My partner and I went on a camping trip recently and we each helped plan the trip including meals, ingredients, cooking and washing up. One of my tests when dating a man is if he's hanging out at the house I start cleaning it. Does he even notice? Does he offer to help? Does he jump up and roll up his sleeves and say put me to work? Or does he just stay sitting on the couch and lift his legs so you can vacuum under his feet?

Sooooooo….. because I really would love to find a life partner to grow old with, I decided to cut out the sex part all together. I wanted to know what it was like when people actually just try to meet each other and get to know each other for who they are, what they might have in common, what their life goals are. I made some very wonderful long distance connections of people who didn't match what I was looking for in a life partner, but the conversations didn't include any kind of sex talk, unsolicited photos etc. It was so refreshing! And then I met this amazing person on the site who is local, and he asked if I had an open mind. He shared that he is trans masc and used to be a woman. He was also sex averse due to a lifetime of trauma in that department and I needed to be okay with an asexual relationship. He is okay with kissing and cuddling but not anything sexual like breasts or below the belt. That's when I explained I was polyamorous so I didn't necessarily need a sexual relationship from a life partner, he needed to be okay with me being polyamorous. He said he was. We had great texting conversations, and I started to feel a connection. (I also do a background check on anyone I might be interested in dating….. And you should too.) When we met, the connection was truly there. And he is by far the best person I have ever dated. He moved in last month because the best way to get to know someone for real is to live with them… Yes he pays rent… and continues to be a great partner living together, sharing household duties and expenses, and traveling together. He works hard at his job and comes home every day to me. Neither one of us drink or do drugs or party. He gave me the code to open his phone without asking, although I've never had a reason to doubt him. There has been no love bombing, no games, no manipulation. This is what relationships should be like whether they are newer relationships or more mature relationships. If things continue to go this well given the test of time, I might even consider getting married again. It's that good. And there is a little happy twist to all of this….. Even though I never expected any kind of sexual activity or connection, my heart started to make me feel that for him. I am polyamorous so I can get that sex elsewhere if needed, but I was just feeling so emotionally close to him and it translated to sexual feelings. I shared those feelings with him, expecting it to be an extremely awkward conversation. I just wanted him to know my feelings, and wanted to reassure him I would never make sexual moves on him or have that expectation. To my surprise he said I'm glad you told me because I've kind of been feeling the same way! He said for the first time in his life he actually feels sexual attraction, and he thinks it's because we have such a safe relationship. His past relationships were also very abusive just like mine. We have both been through lots and lots of therapy. So now we actually have that sexual element in our relationship as well and it just adds the icing to the cake that was already very good. If you've made it this far, I would love to hear your input on my story, and if you think the reason this is working out so well is because I'm dating someone who knows what it's like to be a woman, and lastly, do you think you would be able to have an open mind and date a trans person if it happened organically?

Trash was picked up today, hoping this just blew into the driveway. Is this a toilet seal or something?

They closed with no warning and didn't tell staff about the closing and was supposed to be auctioning off memorabilia at the end of this month. Sooo why am I getting this free dessert? Why tease me? 😭