Having chicken and broccoli with fried rice(even though I asked for steamed white rice but oh well)
I’m not entirely sure if I’m looking for advice, but would appreciate any. I feel like my mind might already be made up and I’m just trying to get this off my chest.
So I have a regular job, but for the past few years on and off, I’ve also worked part-time as an in-person sex worker. Through doing this, of course I’ve met quite a lot of people, and I’ve had to learn to navigate my way in the community and as such, it’s always been difficult for anyone to find true friends in that community as a lot of people tend to unfortunately use each other for a specific purpose if it helps their business essentially.
I have two ladies that I have become close to in the past few years or so, though I’m starting to question my value to them lately, especially since it feels like sometimes they’ll hang out with each other or other sex workers and don’t really think to invite me to these hangouts. I don’t wanna think that it has to do with the fact that my rates don’t match theirs and that I don’t bring in a certain amount of income like they do, but it does start to feel like that when I see what kind of providers they’re surrounding themselves with and making plans with each other and not me. I know they’re typically higher earners than me and that’s fine, but maybe it’s not fine to them and hanging out with me looks bad for them?
Essentially, I overall don’t think I’m seen as the kind of friend I was hoping to. I consider them family friends, but I don’t think they see me the same way if that makes sense and I think it’s time to end the friendship essentially. I got into a bit of an argument with one of them the other day over something so small and dumb and we haven’t really talked again to try and reconcile. But the secondary woman in our friend group, when I tried to text her and talk about it, she made it seem like she was out of the country touring, and that she didn’t have any input to say about the situation with me and friend A, aside from she hoped it would get resolved soon.
Then I happen to look at my Find My app on my phone, I was trying to fix a feature with my luggage tag and trying to see if it would work, and we all are sharing our location with each other, and I see the two of them are both here and hanging out with each other currently. I just don’t think there’s any trust here and I think it’s time to just let things go, especially if I’ve been feeling questionable about this friendship in the long run. I guess part of me doesn’t want to let it go because I don’t wanna think that they’re those types of people, especially since they were both there for me when my parents passed away. But I’m unsure.