from the weekend we met, two and half years ago, I never stood a chance against his videogames.
it took two years for us to finally officialise our relationship and I was (and probably still am) delulu I'll be more important than those videogames. but, well… not at all.
there are days in which he spends the whole day playing something (alone or not) and completely ignores me. it doesn't matter if I texted him, if I called him, if something happened and I need help. he won't look away from the screen.
last week my dad was hospitalised due to severe anemia and I was terrified, as I'd never seen my dad sick in my whole life. I texted my boyfriend many times as I was crying in fear and anxiety, but i would barely get a reply.
and, it seems this was not enough, he spent a whole day playing something and didn't want to spend time with me when I came back home from the hospital, as he said everything was ok now and he wanted to play with his friends. sis, I was crashing out with anxiety. can't you turn it off to be by my side at least for today?
I asked him if everything was ok and he replied it was getting exhausting to answer this question. if I ask it it's because something feels off and I want to solve it asap. but solving things in our relationship is not as cool as defeating a boss on elden ring, I guess.
I'm tired and i don't know what to feel, what to think, what to do.
but now let's enjoy this russian-ish food my family makes!