I’m single again for the first time in years and male friends and acquaintances and coworkers are crawling out of the woodwork to ask me out. I forgot what this felt like. It’s making me question the motive of any of my male friendships ever and honestly is just triggering anger whenever it happens. Because these are coworkers or acquaintances or people I just genuinely don’t have much in common with. Or even ones it is wildly apparent we would not be compatible. Which sounds vain but I genuinely don’t even think this pattern has anything to do with me specifically, more just that some men struggle to see women as friends and have to “test the waters” and now I’m available so they can’t just be fucking normal friends or whatever the fuck. Idk.
In the beginning I was able to fully honestly say “I *just* got out of a four year relationship and cannot even fathom interacting with anyone in any way other than friendship” but now I realize some of them heard this as a “try again later”. Even the ones I’ve told directly “I am not interested in anything other than friendship with you” seem to hear “try again later”. Or they hear that and ask me “why?” And I don’t have a good reason that isn’t “I do not and will not ever find you attractive”… but like, that’s really rude and feels unnecessary to actually say.
What do they expect to hear when asking “why”???